I do. I really do. Only not so avidly as I used to. And sometimes I long to go on a walk somewhere, by myself, no kids, no obligations, and just take pictures of whatever catches my fancy. I need to fall in love with photography again because somewhere between first trimester nausea, home renovations, and cranky, tantrum-throwing kids, photography became a chore, a duty, a drudgery. And I miss loving it. I miss reaching for my camera fifty times a day to catch this expression or that funny posture. Thankfully, I feel the passion returning, but while my spirit is willing, my body protests. My chubby little self can't keep up with my inspiration. How can I be at once a congealed and growing mass of fat and feel as though I'm stretched thinner and skinnier than I've ever been? I need my body to reflect my spirit in order to feel whole and complete.
Of course, it might be that what I actually need most is just to DO rather than wistfully DREAM. Dust off the camera and charge up the batteries, get on the treadmill and fight the fat - move, act, DO - not just be. I need to live, not just exist. I need to MAKE myself the gorgeous starlet I am in my head. :D
Okay, GREAT! It worked. My pep talk worked. See ya later! I'm goin' to get my camera. Hasta la vista, Baby.
And here are a couple of gems as proof that my pointer finger still gets a rare workout now and then:
{A Bug in my blankets!}
{Buddha at Cabrillo Lighthouse}
3 comments:
I think you are beautiful just the way you are.
Hey hey! That's the "golden ratio" or something or other (what was it called?) isn't it? Took a photography comp. class. :) I have to say, I am always hard on myself when it comes to photography because I have seen what you can do. You are amazing.
You do need to rediscover your passion for photography because you are truly talented at it. Seriously. I am not just saying that. If I wanted to offer up a fake compliment, I would say something like "yum, spinach shakes sound fantastic." Because, sorry, but to me they do not sound yummy. Hmmmmm...what else can I ramble on about here in the comment section of your blog? Oh, I know. I wish to point out that you still have not posted any pregnancy pics and I want to see you! Everyone loves a pregnant lady. And The Chief is right. One of my favorite things about you is that you always seem completely content in your own skin. You are beautiful and I hereby request that you not waste another second of this life thinking you aren't. Ok? :) Love ya! Miss the Bagels - hope to see you all soon.
L
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